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December 2011

How to Have Happier Holidays

The holiday season is upon us in full force, and if we believe the media good-times advertising blitz, they'll be full of unlimited joy and good tidings. (I was never sure what tidings are. If anyone knows, let me know!)

Families with problematic substance users usually dread the holidays, the constant worry of their struggling family member spoiling the family's  good times with unpredictable behavior.

Here are some suggestions for not just  'getting through' the holiday season, but to help you and the rest of your family to enjoy it more.

Set firm and  respectful boundaries. This guideline for boundaries hold true 365 days a year, but re-establishing them during the holiday season will lower the likelihood of your holiday being disappointing.

Look at the larger picture. The fact that there are many other occasions down the road to celebrate, reflects an aspect of addiction and recovery that my clients often have a hard time grasping: addiction and recovery are a process that unfolds over time, with progress and relapse, ebbs and flows.

Manage your expectations is another important concept. Having a realistic and flexible sense of what to expect can make adjusting to the normal slips and slides of life in recovery easier.

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